We must open in November. This Bela Lugosi of all buildings is sucking blood-money fast while Boris Karloff has regulations and delays bolted to his neck. Each is starring as chief disablers, fighting us to the death. Ready or not, we MUST open in November. The teaser is – when? This will be announced on webs and facebooks soon.
Best to keep the whole of November’s Thursdays to Sundays free. Or better still, wait and come to a proper up-and-running film the following week, when all the fanfares have quietened and we can open properly…
It will be a long weekend of four opening nights. Each will be an opening night in its own right. There is no chance of getting everybody in for a single opening night or even four. Lenders, small investors, known donors, seat sponsors will be on the list alongside the great & the good, the builders and volunteer fundraisers. But the list will not squeeze in the whole of St Albans. All opening weekend invitations will be an invitation, not only to come, but to pay to come, including all of the above. There’ll be no free rides for at least ten years!
So when the date is announced we will set up a ticket office and inform you when to start queuing. We must get the building right, or after 19 years closed and in ruins, and the eight years of Horror B-Movie adventure, Lugosi and Karloff will refuse us permission to open.
So when the date is announced, the screen, curtains, carpet, seats, projection and sound will be in place and fully up and running. The bars might be buckets of bubbly served from shovels, but the toilets will be magnificent, and the bright ‘exit’ signs the first thing you’ll see. We can welcome you with exits like a trolley dolly…!
A few fantastic, if crazy, anonymous couples want to pay £500 a seat for the opening weekend.
Are there more fantastic couples, singles, quads who would like to do the same…?
You don’t all have to pay that price of course. Other opening nights’ ticket prices will be announced when the opening dates are fixed. But please feel free to join this new exclusive £500 Club!!
A further incentive to secure your invitation ahead of the day, is to sponsor those remaining 190 seats. Now is the time Balcony seats £1000. Table seats £1500 and all corporate seats anywhere £1500. So move quickly, there is no better time than this last chance.
Please keep an eye on the websites and facebooks over the coming weeks.
All enquiries, sponsorships or 500Club applications to Marie Jahn at email@example.com
All characters appearing in this are fictitious. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.